LOVE IS: The quest for, above all else, a soul-mate. INFJs are interested only in the perfect relationship.
FALLS IN LOVE: Slowly. With their head first and then with all their heart. INFJs have a depth of caring not usually found in others.
FALLS OUT OF LOVE: Can leave a relationship once they're sure it's over. A partner who violates the INFJ's values will be cut off forever.
INTIMACY: A near-spiritual experience of bonding heart and soul. It's important for INFJs to know that their mates are happy.
COMMITMENT: Seeks a lifelong, commited relationship. INFJs approach their intimate relationships quite seriously.
MOST SATISFIED WITH: A partner who respects their deeply held values and and who appreciates their creativity and inspiration.
Tthe INFJ is supportive and guided by a sense of integrity. The INFJ is encouraging of their partners dreams, aspirations and achievements. INFJs want to maintain harmony in their relationships and are extremely motivated to resolve conflicts; however, when it comes to their core values and ethics, they are unwilling to compromise. INFJs seek emotional engagement, and are happiest when they feel they and their mates are sharing their innermost thoughts and feelings.
INFJs value a partner who respects their deeply-held values, and one who appreciates their creativity and inspiration.
Warm, gentle and affirming by nature.
Sensitive and concerned for others' feelings.
Takes their commitments and responsibilities very seriously.
Dedicated to achieving the ultimate relationship.
Uncritical devotion may lead to disillusionment
Wants to have own way but also wants to be liked
May use convoluted tactics to avoid conflict
May create tension in relationships by working too hard to eliminate it.
He had many female friends in high school, some of whom were interested in him. He dated a couple but didn't find it very satisfying. In college, he was convinced he'd found the woman of his dreams. They hit it off right away and dated for two years before he found out she'd been cheating on him almost the whole time. She told him she felt trapped because he idealized her so much. Now he's dating a new woman and is working to view their relationship more realistically.
She seldom dated in high school since she was studious and reserved, intimidating the guys. In college she dated more often. Rachel had a boyfriend who pursued her. It was a passionate affair which quickly burned out when she became convinced he didn't really love her. Later she met another man. Within a few weeks, they were certain they were meant for each other. A year later, they married..
Male and female INFJ relationship portraits from Please Understand Me: Temperament, Character, Intelligence by Dr David Keirsey
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References: Murray State University, Profound Knowledge Products, My Personality, Personality Desk, Personality Page and David Markley. Also various works by: Paul Tieger and Barbara Barron-Tieger, Otto Kroeger and Janet M. Thuesen, Florence Littauer, Alexander Avila and Naomi and Alan Quenk.