I love this book! My fiance and I went through it and it’s taken us over a year to complete it, but we're talkers. It gave us a great opportunity to share information about ourselves that we might not have thought of or that we might have been reluctant to bring up on our own.

1,001 Questions to Ask Before You Get Married – Monica Mendez Leahy.

“It will make you think about what you really want in a relationship.”

“The only marriage preparation book I carry in my bridal boutique. I like its non-threatening and non-preachy tone. It makes me feel good to know I’m offering brides something more than a beautiful wedding gown and accessories.”

“A book for people who really need to think about what kind of changes married life will bring.”

“The author has really thought through life’s possibilities exhaustively ... I’d give this to anyone who is marriage-minded. Even if you've met ‘the one’, sometimes it’s better to know up front what you’re dealing with and face it head on than find out later.”

“I’m a psychologist and I recommend this book to couples (married or not) to help with existing issues or to proactively address many questions that come up naturally in relationships. I even bought it for my brother and his girlfriend.”

“My fiance and I are going through this book before we get married, and its been alot of help. We're learning a few new things about each other, but mostly it is getting us talking about our views and what we want for the future.”

“Steps you through the inquiries all couples should discuss before walking down the aisle. Author Monica Mendez Leahy understands the foundational essence of talking through these subjects.”

“Many chapters end by offering thoughts on the answers each of you gave and urges reconciliation where differences were unearthed.”

“This book should not be purchased with dread, but should be viewed as an opportunity to enrich your relationship and learn more about the person you love.”

“A must-read for any couple even throwing around the idea of marriage.”

“Really great. It asks questions that we wouldn’t normally think of and gave us alot of insight to one another and they are serious questions that every couple should ask one another. It has really helped us communicate about some serious subjects. Thanks!”

“Very time consuming. But be patient it is worth the time. I am also happy to report that the love of my life has been so great at working thru this book. And it has really confirmed for us that we are truly meant for each other!”

“A great vehicle for meaningful conversation and exploration.”

“I was more determined to pick up a book before the wedding than my husband was, but we were both insanely glad we got this. It really makes you face situations that would take YEARS to come up, and it was really the best tool we could have had before we made the big leap. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED to anyone looking at marriage. ”

“I loved this book because it actually got him to sit down with me and we actually thought about our answers and discussed how we felt. The book covers everything. I highly recommend it.”

“I’m going through this with my boyfriend right now and it brings up lots of thought-provoking questions and topics that we may have not talked about otherwise. This is definitely bringing us close together, so when we make the decision to get married, we will know for sure.”

“Gave this to my daughter and her fiancee to prepare them for the most important decision they’ll ever make. They laughed at first, but can’t stop talking about how much fun it is to ask all the questions. The sections about finances and in-laws are particularly good. I am recommending this book to all my friends who have kids of marrying age.”

reviews from Amazon.com

There's nothing wrong with starter jobs and starter homes, but starter marriages? For twenty years relationship expert Monica Mendez Leahy has been on a mission to help couples create marriages that last.

Her 1,001 Questions to Ask Before You Get Married offers a reality check for couples on the marriage path, helping them realize how much they have yet to discover about their partner's nature, thought processes, lifestyle, and marital expectations.

Love can be bliss, but marriage takes work. 1,001 Questions will help you and your partner discuss the deeper issues and to broach subjects that are often ignored before the nuptials – yet essential for the foundation of an intimate, long-lasting relationship.

Reading this book together will enable you both to explore your common goals and perspectives – as well as celebrate your unique differences as you prepare for your life journey together.

Using a variety of fun, interactive formats, including multiple choice, fill-in-the-blank, and hypotheticals, author Monica Mendez Leahy prompts discussion and sharing of important issues that will arise in every marriage.

Some may seem silly: ‘Are you a light or heavy packer?’. Or simple: ‘Do you consider yourself a morning or night person?’. But every one provides insight into your mate’s habits and characteristics that you’ll be living with, well, forever.

Although all 1001 Questions are important, here is Monica’s personal Top Ten List. So, before you commit, be sure to inquire:

  • At School Were You The Geek, Stoner, Bully, or Jock?: People can change with time, but it is also clear that we do not stray far from the basic personality traits we displayed as teenagers.
  • Are You Turning Into Your Mother or Father?: Try as we might, we can’t deny our genetic make up or the influence of our parents on the way we are in our own relationships.
  • What Did You Do When Your Team Lost?: Noting reactions to losses both large and small gives great insight as to how a person handles unexpected crises, a major predictor of a successful marriage.
  • Would You Like to Be Cloned?: This is a good litmus test for asking about the role children will play in your relationship. Do you both want to have kids? If so, what motivates your desire?
  • What’s Your Credit Rating?:A question as important as it is unromantic. Money is the primary source of tension for couples.
  • Where Will You Be on Hanukah, Christmas, or Kwanza?: Divvying up holidays can be a severe source of stress for couples.
  • Are You Into Bondage?: Couples shouldn’t even consider saying ‘I Do’ until they have discussed how their sexual preferences. And how they will deal with sexual dissatisfaction.
  • Can I Go to Lunch With My Ex?: Better to discuss and agree now the boundaries for social behavior before diving in to a lifetime commitment.
  • Will it Be Church or Golf This Sunday?: What role does religion play in your life? How will it play out in your relationship? And what about politcial opinions and social views?

Thinking back over her own life, Monica writes:

“I got married and it was a shock even though my husband and I had gone through marriage-prep classes; it really was an eye opener for me. There are so many things that couples are unaware of, and it really is a time of adjustment. I wanted to share that with other people and let them know what they were getting into.”

“I worked for a long time in a bridal store, and I would hear these stories about how people would meet and fall in love We would help brides get married and a year later they would be back for round No. 2, and we would ask what happened and what went wrong.”

“I wanted the book to be primarily and most importantly about self discovery, because only when you know what you want and what you are all about can you really look for it in a partner ... somebody who’s going to help you keep the goals you set out for yourself and someone who is really compatible with your sensitivity.”

“We always hear the ever popular irreconcilable difference is the leading cause of divorce, but really it’s erroneous expectations. Many people expect married life to be a continuation of a honeymoon free from stress and that’s not what marriage is about.”

“The reason I chose a variety of fun, interactive formats, including multiple choice, fill-in-the-blank and hypotheticals, is that this interactive format really promotes a dialog that will help individuals find out first about themselves and then about their partners.”

“I recommend couples read it at a leisurely pace, when they think they can devote the time to actually think about the questions and give honest answers without hurrying and without distraction. Only when you know that can you develop the path for your life and choose the course that you want.”

1,001 Questions to Ask Before You Get Married will help you and your partner explore your common goals and perspectives as well as celebrate your unique differences as you prepare for your life journey together.

About the Author

Monica Mendez Leahy has been helping couples prepare for marriage for more than twenty years, and as a Deputy Commissioner of Civil Marriages for the County of Los Angeles, has married hundreds of couples. With her husband she hosts couples’ workshops in the Los Angeles area and has been featured in the Ladies Home Journal and the Wall Street Journal and on Lifetime Television.